https://grlucas.net/index.php?title=January_7,_2020&feed=atom&action=historyJanuary 7, 2020 - Revision history2024-03-29T12:34:04ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.39.0https://grlucas.net/index.php?title=January_7,_2020&diff=5992&oldid=prevGrlucas: More tweaks.2020-01-08T23:12:44Z<p>More tweaks.</p>
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<td colspan="2" style="background-color: #fff; color: #202122; text-align: center;">Revision as of 19:12, 8 January 2020</td>
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<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>OK, fine. However, I’m not sure how I can do any of these things. It seems like I get more angry and stressed the older I get. I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? ''Everything'' bothers me. I can’t seem to accept anything with equanimity: it’s like the universe has something against me. If it’s annoying or inconvenient, it’ll find me. ''Everything'' is a hassle. I’m insomniac ''most'' of the time. Byron suggests that the above help in developing and practicing “loving kindness,” and all I can think about is the utter futility of my ever getting anywhere close to either ''love'' or ''kindness''.</div></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>OK, fine. However, I’m not sure how I can do any of these things. It seems like I get more angry and stressed the older I get. I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? ''Everything'' bothers me. I can’t seem to accept anything with equanimity: it’s like the universe has something against me. If it’s annoying or inconvenient, it’ll find me. ''Everything'' is a hassle. I’m insomniac ''most'' of the time. Byron suggests that the above help in developing and practicing “loving kindness,” and all I can think about is the utter futility of my ever getting anywhere close to either ''love'' or ''kindness''.</div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="−"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #ffe49c; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>What is my problem?</div></td><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="+"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #a3d3ff; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div><ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">''</ins>What is my problem?<ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">''</ins></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="−"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #ffe49c; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>I saw another post on Reddit about getting a teacher. Shainberg <del style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">has </del>a master to <del style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">help </del>guide him; maybe I need the same? Maybe an analyst, like [[December 4, 2019|Susan Mailer]] had for a decade? Anti-depressants? Pot? As my friend Walter said once about his relationship to green tea: “it winds me up tighter than a banjo string.” Shit, ''life'' does that to me.</div></td><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="+"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #a3d3ff; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>I saw another post on Reddit about getting a teacher. Shainberg <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">had </ins>a master to guide him; maybe I need the same? Maybe an analyst, like [[December 4, 2019|Susan Mailer]] had for a decade? Anti-depressants? Pot? As my friend Walter said once about his relationship to green tea: “it winds me up tighter than a banjo string.” Shit, ''life'' does that to me.</div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>I didn’t mean for this to take a confessional turn—I had the intention of writing about how modern life is less conducive to living like a Buddhist. That it’s easy to practice these things when you’re a monk. That maybe all I can do is try to eliminate as much conflict, chaos, and clutter from my life as I can. Yeah, this was supposed to be a minimalism post. I’ve been edgy lately for no apparent reason. I’m just not sure what to do about it.</div></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>I didn’t mean for this to take a confessional turn—I had the intention of writing about how modern life is less conducive to living like a Buddhist. That it’s easy to practice these things when you’re a monk. That maybe all I can do is try to eliminate as much conflict, chaos, and clutter from my life as I can. Yeah, this was supposed to be a minimalism post. I’ve been edgy lately for no apparent reason. I’m just not sure what to do about it.</div></td></tr>
</table>Grlucashttps://grlucas.net/index.php?title=January_7,_2020&diff=5991&oldid=prevGrlucas: Tweaks.2020-01-08T23:10:53Z<p>Tweaks.</p>
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<td colspan="2" style="background-color: #fff; color: #202122; text-align: center;">Revision as of 19:10, 8 January 2020</td>
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<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>The author, Byron, concludes: “Understanding cause and effect develops our wisdom, experiencing impermanence brings us peace, and practicing mindfulness leads to fulfillment.” </div></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>The author, Byron, concludes: “Understanding cause and effect develops our wisdom, experiencing impermanence brings us peace, and practicing mindfulness leads to fulfillment.” </div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="−"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #ffe49c; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>OK, fine. However, I’m not sure how I can do any of these things. It seems like I get more angry and stressed <del style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">as </del>I get <del style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">older</del>. I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? Everything bothers me. I can’t seem to accept anything with equanimity: it’s like the universe has something against me. Everything is a hassle. I’m insomniac most of the time. Byron suggests that the above help in developing and practicing “loving kindness,” and all I can think about is the utter futility of my ever getting anywhere close.</div></td><td class="diff-marker" data-marker="+"></td><td style="color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #a3d3ff; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>OK, fine. However, I’m not sure how I can do any of these things. It seems like I get more angry and stressed <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">the older </ins>I get. I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">''</ins>Everything<ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">'' </ins>bothers me. I can’t seem to accept anything with equanimity: it’s like the universe has something against me. <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">If it’s annoying or inconvenient, it’ll find me. ''</ins>Everything<ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">'' </ins>is a hassle. I’m insomniac <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">''</ins>most<ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">'' </ins>of the time. Byron suggests that the above help in developing and practicing “loving kindness,” and all I can think about is the utter futility of my ever getting anywhere close <ins style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">to either ''love'' or ''kindness''</ins>.</div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br/></td></tr>
<tr><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>What is my problem?</div></td><td class="diff-marker"></td><td style="background-color: #f8f9fa; color: #202122; font-size: 88%; border-style: solid; border-width: 1px 1px 1px 4px; border-radius: 0.33em; border-color: #eaecf0; vertical-align: top; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div>What is my problem?</div></td></tr>
</table>Grlucashttps://grlucas.net/index.php?title=January_7,_2020&diff=5990&oldid=prevGrlucas: Created entry.2020-01-08T23:08:04Z<p>Created entry.</p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>{{Large|Me? A Buddhist? I Wish...}}<br />
[[File:2011-02-06 12-32-14.jpg|thumb]]<br />
I came across this article on Reddit today: “[https://bekindbehappy.net/2019/05/14/3-things-i-learnt-as-a-buddhist-monk/ 3 Things I Learnt as a Buddhist Monk].” Since I’ve been trying to write [[January 6, 2020|this review]], I needed a refresher on Buddhism, and this article appeared serendipitously (karmicly?). It didn’t really give me any new information, but what it did state was depressing.<br />
<br />
In a nutshell, what he learned is (and I’m paraphrasing):<br />
<br />
# Realize that every cause has an effect and every effect results from causes and conditions, including our brains and their activities.<br />
# Accept that everything is impermanent, so live for the now.<br />
# Be mindful.<br />
<br />
The author, Byron, concludes: “Understanding cause and effect develops our wisdom, experiencing impermanence brings us peace, and practicing mindfulness leads to fulfillment.” <br />
<br />
OK, fine. However, I’m not sure how I can do any of these things. It seems like I get more angry and stressed as I get older. I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? Everything bothers me. I can’t seem to accept anything with equanimity: it’s like the universe has something against me. Everything is a hassle. I’m insomniac most of the time. Byron suggests that the above help in developing and practicing “loving kindness,” and all I can think about is the utter futility of my ever getting anywhere close.<br />
<br />
What is my problem?<br />
<br />
I saw another post on Reddit about getting a teacher. Shainberg has a master to help guide him; maybe I need the same? Maybe an analyst, like [[December 4, 2019|Susan Mailer]] had for a decade? Anti-depressants? Pot? As my friend Walter said once about his relationship to green tea: “it winds me up tighter than a banjo string.” Shit, ''life'' does that to me.<br />
<br />
I didn’t mean for this to take a confessional turn—I had the intention of writing about how modern life is less conducive to living like a Buddhist. That it’s easy to practice these things when you’re a monk. That maybe all I can do is try to eliminate as much conflict, chaos, and clutter from my life as I can. Yeah, this was supposed to be a minimalism post. I’ve been edgy lately for no apparent reason. I’m just not sure what to do about it.<br />
<br />
{{2020}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:01/2020]]<br />
[[Category:Life]]<br />
[[Category:Minimalism]]</div>Grlucas